Thursday, September 9, 2010

331 days. One month left.

I messed up counting days somewhere along the line. haha. I'll fix it later.

It's been busy lately wrapping up the end of summer! Like many other things right now, I can't believe it's the end of summer. Seriously.
Monday, the 13th is my birthday. Not that it's of too much importance. My birthday has never been a huge ordeal or widely recognized. And that's okay. I mean, there's a small part of me that's bummed every time around, but not really, in the whole scheme of things. Especially this year. Monday, September 13th marks the beginning of the last month of Owen's first year. Sharing the same date for a birthday as O really makes up for all the birthdays I've ever been bummed about. How the hell did this happen? I need to get shit organized! I need to get going on this dude's celebration! I'll spare you this time around, but this is your warning that the next post will most likely be an "Owen: This is your life" kind of post.

So. Yeah, lately. More lake house. O had his first trip to Lincoln Park Zoo. He loved the giraffes. Nicole and Tristan hosted a marvelous dinner party. All of which you can see on my flickr page, per usual. Lots and lots of fun stuff.

Last week Laura, Jen, Nikko and I brought our dudes together for an informal baby photo session with Michelle that was ridiculously fun. I mean, yeah. Michelle is awesome. No, really. The best.


We didn't do much for labor day, but it was a really awesome day. Finally made it to the Calumet Fisheries. Awesome. We've been wanting to go since that episode of No Reservations. So worth it. Best catfish I've had outside of what I've caught fishing with my dad. Cruising around the south side is awesome. I know Filip hates being in the car, but I could drive around and look at buildings and ghettos and lots and everything all day long and be content. We made a stop at Promontory Point, like we do. Would have stopped at the African Festival but O had just knocked out in the back seat. It was a pretty great labor day.




Man. A whole year already. I just don't know. I've never before in my entire life thought about death as much as I have in this past year and have never been this scared of it. Even now, I'm awake. It's well after midnight but I couldn't zonk out. Most nights I lay there getting pissed off that I can't fall asleep, but tonight I just felt like I was being nagged. Too many things racing through my head I guess. Filip's been suffering pretty badly from allergies lately and so the noises he's making right now aren't exactly lullabies. Laying there thinking of stupid shit I was going to say and forgot. Thinking about Finks I have to get done, that handful of weird video clips I was working on this afternoon of re-enactments of King Louis XVI in the guillotine, what my favorite breakfast is, Filip's elbow jabbing me kind of weird because he's dead to the world from allergy medication, eczema, Owen saying "Dra-da" so confidently over and over all day today and how damn cute and amazing it was, Totti, the night Owen was born. It always kind of wraps up or leads back to those. I think about Totti a lot. I know, gay, but that damn dog was tattooed on my arm BEFORE she died. And Owen being born. I feel like I can't even really remember it anymore. I mean, I can, but it's so insane how much you forget in such little time. I could spend hours on end telling you about the day Owen was born, barely breaking to even draw in a breath let alone giving you an opportunity to comment, but I feel like there's hours and hours of lost footage that I just can't place anymore. It's normal, I guess, but damn you, fleeting time. Why do I lay in bed thinking about breakfast or re-enactments or the ComEd bill? Why is that stupid shit taking up space in my brain when all I want to do is remember every exact detail from one fucking night? Nuts, man. Nuts on Clark. Where's my goddamn tardis?

I don't really know. I know in a month's time I will have had the best year of my life. What comes around goes around. Karma, crap like that. I'm totally broke, but there's no dollar amount that could even come close to what I have. Sometimes I'm all like, "Dang! When's this karma crap gonna come around and be all like, 'You're turn for good shit?'" But then I realize that's when I'm bratty for a minute, totally have clouded vision, haven't slept enough and stuck in my own head for too long because I mostly just hang out with small humans who can't vocalize anything. It is good. Right now. It's good, so good. I mean, you know, there's regular stuff that you gotta get through, and we're doing that and I'm feeling good about it. I love my family. Feels so weird to say that still. I'm super scared to let go of this first year but so super excited to see what happens next. And it's knitting season. Not that there's a season for it for me, but you know, there's that super romantic sort of feeling about knitting in front of the fireplace with spiced cider and all that. So, that means it's almost fireplace season, which is also going to be amazing! Smores all winter long! Also, not to mention that every, every last stitch in my closet, even the ones I thought would be completely hopeless and retired for the rest of my life, of tiny, regular pre-pregnancy clothes fit perfectly after ballooning to quite an incredible size this time last year. I'm not busting a hole in my blue jeans anytime soon!
Go me! It's my birthday. I mean, and really, it almost is! Which just means it's one month away from Owen's! Holy shit, dudes, where does the time go?