do i need to say that i've been meaning to get to writing a post but have had my hands full? yeh. again, a day or two ended up turning into a couple weeks without me realizing it. but i guess that's how things go now, right? and my ever breaking computer makes most things really time consuming and sort of like a chore. i'm going to be duct taping this thing together soon. i'm hoping it hangs on for a while longer...
owen is 5 weeks old today. the longest five weeks wrapped into what seems like the most tiring day ever. i mean that in a good way, like, the shortest five weeks, but so long ago at the same time. you know what i mean? i seriously could have never anticipated how rapidly this dude would develop. i mean, yeh, i knew from books and people telling me how things would be, but its so much different than actually experiencing it on a first hand basis. his eyesight is really incredible now! he hasn't crossed his eyes trying to focus in a couple weeks. last week he noticed his mobile hanging above his crib. its pretty goddamn cute. as soon as i turn the knob his head rolls over super quick to look at it, and when it turns off he starts crying and hollering for me to turn the crank again. as soon as it starts he settles down immediately and stares at it in awe mumbling weird baby noises. pretty awesome. the past few days i've totally caught him smiling here and there but not until this morning was i convinced that they really are real smiles. after a diaper change and breakfast we were hanging around in bed and this guy was a total smile factory. i still thought it could have been a fluke but this afternoon he was up to it again. he kept acting cool as a cucumber with the camera out but i managed to snap this partial smile with my phone.
so yeh. we're smiling now. he's makin me smile like never before in my whole life. how the hell can something be so amazing?
we still haven't slept a ton lately. i, for sure, go through short stints of being so super irritable from the deprivation. filip does too, i think. but its not really enough to cause any sort of major melt downs or anything. usually Owen will fart or do something ridiculous and we'll get over it. we've both been giving each other a few hours here and there to let the other sleep through a feeding or diaper change. its nice, but we could both definitely use a whole night uninterrupted. dang, i can't even remember what that's like. we're both running on fumes, well past the reserve tank. its nuts to think people can actually operate on so little rest. its dangerous. filip actually got into a car accident the weekend after Owen was born, and it hasn't gotten much better since. sleep deprivation is more dangerous than being drunk. ha, that has to be why there's not a lot of interest in drinking right after giving birth, the lack of sleep is way way way more detrimental.
but really, the sleep thing is to be expected, you know? its regular and how it should be for having a five week old baby. what isn't expected is how fucking incredible this guy is outside of the house! on his 5th day we took him outside for the first time and right to lula, naturally. since then we have taken him out of the house every day. and we haven't had a single catastrophe or cry attack or anything. he's quiet as a mouse every time we leave the house. he zonks right out anytime we're at a bar or loud restaurant. its weird. and amazing. white noise. different smells. if we stay at home for awhile he gets bored and fusses and gets all antsy, but he never acts like that when we're out. so we take him out a ton. instead of having a baby that needs a walk in the stroller or car ride to fall asleep, we have one that has to go to the bar or cafe. ha! go figure! this dude has been an absolute trooper at the last two Fire games of the season too! it was super fun. we took lots of awesome pictures (see my flickr!) and Owen got his first soccer scarf! tiniest supporter! next season is going to be super fun with this dude! my winter project is to knit a miniature Fire scarf for Owen, double knit, sock yarn and super intarsia! its gonna be cute!
last game of the season. dan's brick. i think we've got this guy off to a pretty good start.
so personally, i've recovered pretty good. i don't have anything to complain about, although i do, because im terribly impatient and want all fifty of those pounds i gained gone, and its gonna take a while. we go to see Jen next week for a 6 week check up and i'll find out how much i've lost then since we don't have a scale at home. seriously, other than that, i'm back to normal. well, no, i take that back. i mean, im in good shape and i feel good, but my mindset is not "normal" for me. its changed and its much better. even more than when i last blogged, some things just aren't worth worrying about anymore. this dude is so incredible and has re focused all of my attention and really put things into perspective. it feels pretty good.
aside from owen, i've managed to finish a good handful of knitting projects and i've started researching some work options, which i'm kinda pumped about. if anyone knows of any bonafide 'work from home' gigs, send me your ideas. dragging this little dude through thrift stores everyday for ebay sales isn't really a good idea. thats a dirty job, owen would probably come out with a third arm. i'm definitely not ready to be apart from him for a full time job, and with the cold getting colder we're going to become less mobile. we'll figure something out.
so yeh. routine. i'm trying to stay on top of things, but there's so much to stay on top of now. trying to stay regular. routine. new routine. awesome new routine. happiest routine ever.
i totally wanted to, like always, but had no hope of nanowrimo this year. next november, seriously this time.